The self needs a balance of necessity and possibility – it will suffocate in too much necessity but vaporize in too much possibility. Throughout history, crushing necessity has been the usual problem but contemporary self is being driven mad by infinite possibility.
– Kierkegaard, as summarised by Michael Foley (The Age of Absurdity)
The capacity to be alone is the capacity to love. It may look paradoxical to you, but it’s not. It is an existential truth: only those people who are capable of being alone are capable of love, of sharing, of going into the deepest core of another person–without possessing the other, without becoming dependent on the other, without reducing the other to a thing, and without becoming addicted to the other. They allow the other absolute freedom, because they know that if the other leaves, they will be as happy as they are now. Their happiness cannot be taken by the other, because it is not given by the other.
I am relieved to realize my husband and I are a family, not because our personalities are best suited or because we make time to get out of the house as a couple, but because we live together. Because we eat and sleep and rise and play and fight and fuck and pass time together.
– Nikaela Marie Peters, A Happening of Humans. here or here (different beautiful photos)
it’s not one thing or the other that leads to madness, but the space between them
– Jeanette Winterson, Oranges Are Not The Only Fruit
We are eternally beginning again. Continually; begin again. The healing is the return not in the never wandered to have begin with.
– Sharon Salzberg, here
Do not engage in oppositionism. Establish an alternative and live in it.
– Andy Puddicombe, talking on Under The Skin (with Russell Brand).
The pleasure of abiding. The pleasure of insistence, of persistence. The pleasure of obligation, the pleasure of dependency. The pleasures of ordinary devotion. The pleasure of recognising that one may have to undergo the same realisations, write the same notes in the margin, return to the same theme’s in ones work, relearn the same emotional truths, write the same book over and over again – not because one is stupid or obstinate or incapable of change, but because such revisitations constitute a life.
– Maggie Nelson, The Argonauts